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Pre-Marital Experiences
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In the Philippines, does body count matter before liking or marrying someone? What do Filipinos think of virgins and people who had many partners?
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My father-in-law told me, with some pride in his voice: “Before I met and married your mother-in-law, Jean-Marie, I had been with twenty-two girls already…” “Been with, as in dated?” I wanted to know. “Been with, as in, slept with. Had sex with.” He was quite proud of the fact — especially considering that he was only twenty-three years old when he got married. He had been quite a busy young lad. Now, I have to say, he’s a charming and funny man. He’s not at all bad looking. His wife, however? Her ‘body count’ had been zero. Same for my wife, their daughter, prior to meeting me. Zero. Nothing. Not a single man had put his hands on her, let alone more than just his hands. This was, for a long time, kind of ‘the norm’. Nowadays, a lot of Filipinas have plenty of sexual partners as well, often before marriage. But the double standard remains — a man has conquests, a girl is just easy. They’re fond of the key-lock comparison in the Philippines — a key that unlocks many doors, is a master key. A lock that gets unlocked by many keys, is just a shitty lock. Men being keys, of course, and women locks in this example.
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Instead of asking about what “Filipinos” in general think, ask about specific religions. We have diverse religions and beliefs. Catholics and other devout Christians, and maybe even other similar religions, have the same belief across the globe. These religions dictate people’s personal opinions. As an agnostic, I do not subscribe to these views. So personally speaking, these things did not/do not matter to me. I am married to a like-minded man.